From the monthly archives: March 2007

Girl scouts spread terror

by Jeffrey on March 29, 2007 · 6 Comments · in american-ism, ignorance

I received Samoas in the mail this week! I shared this news with Isha1.

Using verbs as nouns

by Jeffrey on March 28, 2007 · 12 Comments · in american-ism, intolerance, kiwi-ism, speech

 I am a snob.  I am an American snob. This post is about the difference between American English and New Zealand English, which are bastardized versions of British English1. I don’t mind, because bastards are interesting2.

Un-American activities

by Jeffrey on March 25, 2007 · 7 Comments · in american-ism, intolerance

Almost all Americans ask me, “Why did you leave?” And almost all Kiwis ask me, “Why did you choose New Zealand?” It’s as if they see an apple pie in a field of pavlovas and say, what’s that doing here?

Cutlery, meet Head

by Jeffrey on March 24, 2007 · 7 Comments · in catholic-ism, guilt, jeffrey-ism, odd

While walking down Cuba street I thought, “How fat do you have to be to become bulletproof?” Wouldn’t that be something! Suddenly, I heard someone say whack and something hit the back of my head.

Oh, the charm!

by Jeffrey on March 22, 2007 · 2 Comments · in kiwi-ism, news

Headline news from New Zealand: The hunt for the six nippled ram. This is precisely why I watch the evening news.

A pox on you, banking devil!

by Jeffrey on March 21, 2007 · 11 Comments · in american-ism, oblivious

When I order coffee I choose a short or long black, which is coffee with a dash of water, and Andy (my coffee buddy) enjoys a doppio cappucino, which is a foamy liquid with chocolate sprinkles. This morning I stopped at my Westpac ATM to withdrawal money to feed my coffee addiction. I put my card into the machine, chose twenty bucks, and took my card out. Now, some people say the purpose of an ATM is to withdrawal money. Oh no, not in my world!